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Jean A. Costa /  Blog
December 6, 2020 In Affirmations

Being Your Better Self

Affirmation: Every day I strive to be a “better” version of myself

“God loves me just as I am but He /She loves me too much to leave me there.”
 – Quote from a fellow Spiritual Director

 

Covid 19 has taken its toll on 2020.  It’s like God has sent us to our knees.  I know He/She has sent me to mine.  My prayer list at the end of this year is longer than it has ever been before and several of those prayers revolve around people I know and love who are dealing with this scourge that has infected our whole earth.  I am, probably like many of you, trying to listen closely to the messages from the Divine that seem to be coming in even more clearly than previously.  This month’s message has been about being the best, or at least the better me possible.

 

Richard Rohr in his book, The Divine Dance, tells the story of sharing with his spiritual director that he would like to be more like Thomas Merton, the great spiritual guru of the 70’s. His wise director told him he should simply be Richard Rohr. He is an American author with over 50 books to this date, spiritual writer, and Franciscan friar based in Albuquerque, New Mexico. PBS has called him “one of the most popular spirituality authors and speakers in the world.” (Wikipedia) It seems like the advice was well received.

 

Then in a conversation with my dear friends, we found ourselves looking at our past and  comparing our accomplishments to people we admire. Matthew Kelly, the founder of the Dynamic Catholic Institute shares in his book, Perfectly Yourself, that his favorite painter is Pablo Picasso.  He shares that when Pablo was younger his mother told him, “Pablo if you become a soldier, you will be a general.  If you become a priest, you will be the Pope.” Pablo then shares, “I became a painter and I became Pablo Picasso.”   Matthew also reminds us that no matter what society tells us about becoming whatever we desire, each of us has been called by God for a very specific reason.  We are here for a purpose.  We aren’t here to be all things to all people.  We are here to be the best version of ourselves we can possibly be or at least the better version of ourselves.

 

I must confess to believing that if I persevere in some endeavor I will eventually accomplish whatever it is I’m trying to master and that I now know that is not true.  I am not someone who regrets not trying to learn or do something of interest and over these many years, I have watched myself become the master of mediocrity at many many different skills.  I won’t bother to list them all here but trust me, there are many.  It’s not like I don’t try and it’s not like I have not invested a lot of time and energy truly believing that if I just hang in there, someday something magical will happen and I will be proficient at my desired talent.  That’s not to say I haven’t enjoyed the learning process or the amazing people and perhaps places I have met and visited along the way.  I have had many wonderful adventures in the pursuit of my different interests but I must confess, I simply did not have the God given talent to become a “good” fiddler, golfer, foreign linguistic, etc.  I think Matthew is right.  Some of us are simply suited to some things, designed for specific gifts, than for other.  The challenge is discovering those gifts, those gifts that God has bestowed on us to benefit this world.  Have you discovered yours?  What a wonder to be young and find that “something” and hone that talent.  I envy those people but “better late than never.”

 

The book I am presently reading is Julia Cameron’s, It’s Never Too Late to Begin Again.  Her first book, The Artist’s Way, changed my life as I know it did many others.  I discovered with the help of some of my dearest friends the gift of creating positive affirmations and of looking for and recognizing synchronicities or as she sometimes calls them, “ah ha moments.”  When I began writing morning pages 30 years ago, I discovered something that fed my soul.That quiet time of sitting and writing has helped me develop the discipline to begin every day with prayer, meditation, Bible study and journaling.  Within the journaling, I have left my petty concerns and discovered my passions and the joy of this blessed life.

 

There are times when I wonder if I’m being selfish by taking that sacred time in the morning but then, Elizabeth Fenske presented in her December writings her concept of Unity and Oneness in her daily meditation book, Spiritual Insights for Daily Living and everything fell into place, at least for 2020.  She writes, “We forget that what we do about the inner self we also do about the world.  No thing is separate from any other thing in the universe.  The auric fields, often invisible to our eyes, are all woven together. With everything which happens, we can “feel” ourselves moving toward a deeper sense of the awareness.  Often in the stillness we intuitively feel and know the interconnectedness and oneness we share related back to a common ancestry.  We are the essence of life, cousin to the star and tigress.”  This for me was an “ah ha moment.”  My dear departed guide, Valerie Kelly, often reminded me that everything we do, everything we say and think, affects every other person in the world.  What a responsibly!!!  If I can maintain an attitude of kindness, compassion and generosity within me and for me, I can send those qualities out into this weary exhausted world and to everyone within it.  My prayer time is not simply time for me, it’s time for you.  The waves of grace and ease, gratitude and compassion, joy and dignity, hope and trust flow out of me and my connection to my Divine family, to my Lord and Savior and blanket all those who have tuned into the same frequency as I and perhaps to those who are simply turning the dial looking for the best station to the guidance about becoming the best version they can be.

November 14, 2020 In Retreats

@Home Retreat, November 2020

Triangle@Home Monthly Morning Retreat
November 21st, 2020
9:00-10:00am

 

*Prepare your space: Find an area where hopefully you will not be disturbed for your quiet time. Perhaps you want a blanket for yourself. 
*Gather your supplies: Timer, note paper and/or journal, pen. You may want to bring in one or two inspirational books. 
*Create an “altar”: Put a few meaningful items out, include a candle. 
*Opening Song – Amazing Grace or song of your choice
(You Tube Link) Alan Jackson – Amazing Grace

Lyrics:
Amazing grace, how sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me
I once was lost, but now am found
Was blind, but now I see
‘Twas grace that taught my heart to fear
And grace my fears relieved
How precious did that grace appear
The hour I first believed
When we’ve been there ten thousand years
Bright shining as the sun
We’ve no less days to sing God’s praise
Than when we first begun
Amazing grace, how sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me
I once was lost, but now am found
Was blind, but now I see
Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: John Newton
*Opening Prayers: The Sign of the Cross, Our Father, Hail Mary or your choice.
*Intention: This is a reflective, healing time and we ask that it be filled with the love of the Holy Spirit, the care of Mother Mary and the guidance of all our guardian angels. We are here to learn from one another and to support each other on our journey towards a closer, more intimate relationship with Our Lord. 
*Write out a prayer request or a few and add them to your “altar.” 
*Reflection – Just when we thought it was getting safer to resume our lives, the Covid 19 virus has become more rampant. Add to that, the political climate has presented itself with conflict and angst.  Now we are faed with decisions about the holidays that are causing sadness and separation. We are still faced with daily decisions based on little information about how to take care of ourselves and our families. How are you doing? How have you continued to stay connected to God, the Divine, Our Lord? What has come into your heart and your life during this time of chaos and uncertainty, peace, hope, fear, compassion, gratitude? 
Using your journal write about any insights. (10-15 min.) 
This Saturday in the Catholic Church is the:

Memorial of the Presentation of the Blessed Virgin Mary

*The Gospel reading is:
LK 20:27-40
Some Sadducees, those who deny that there is a resurrection,
came forward and put this question to Jesus, saying,
“Teacher, Moses wrote for us,
If someone’s brother dies leaving a wife but no child,
his brother must take the wife
and raise up descendants for his brother.
Now there were seven brothers;
the first married a woman but died childless.
Then the second and the third married her,
and likewise all the seven died childless.
Finally the woman also died.
Now at the resurrection whose wife will that woman be?
For all seven had been married to her.”
Jesus said to them,
“The children of this age marry and remarry;
but those who are deemed worthy to attain to the coming age
and to the resurrection of the dead
neither marry nor are given in marriage.
They can no longer die,
for they are like angels;
and they are the children of God
because they are the ones who will rise.
That the dead will rise
even Moses made known in the passage about the bush,
when he called  ‘Lord’
the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob;
and he is not God of the dead, but of the living,
for to him all are alive.”
Some of the scribes said in reply,
“Teacher, you have answered well.”
And they no longer dared to ask him anything.
*Journaling Time – What did you hear God sharing with you? What do you want to share with God? (10-15 minutes) 
*Centering Prayer – 10 to 20 (recommended) minutes of silent time (you decide.) 
Guidelines: 
  1. Sit comfortably.
  2. Choose a sacred word on which to focus.
  3. Set a timer.
  4. Don’t judge, just observe.
  5. The phrase that often precedes Centering Prayer is: I let go of security, affection & control and fully accept this moment exactly as it is. (Optional)
  6. Take a few breaths at the end to return to the present moment and to reflect
    on the experience. 
  7. *Make it Your Own:
    Perhaps you have an inspirational book you have been meaning to investigate but you just haven’t had the opportunity. Now is the time. If you have some time left before the end of the hour open it and see what other messages the Holy is sending to you.
  8. You could also use this time to say the Rosary. Saturday in the Catholic Church is set aside as “Mary’s Day” and the reflection is on the Joyful Mysteries.
*Closing Prayer – 
Dear God,
Speak gently in my silence. 
When the loud outer noises of my surroundings and the loud my fears keep pulling me away from you, 
inner noises of 
help me to trust that you are still there even when I am unable to hear you. Give me ears to listen to your small, soft voice saying: “Come to me, you who 
are overburdened, and I will give you rest… 
for I am gentle and humble of heart.” Let that loving voice be my guide. Amen 
Excerpt from With Open Hands by Henri J.M. Nouwen, ave maria press, 2006 
“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your minds, so that you may discern what is the will of God-what is good and acceptable and perfect.” Romans 12:1-2 
*Sharing a Word Exercise – choose a word from your reading or your quiet time (your sacred word?) and share it on an email to me. Feel free to share any other thoughts or insights you have gained from this sacred time. I will send out an email with everyone’s response some time today. 
Thank you. 
Jean Costa, MSW, RYT 
Certified Spiritual Director, JeanAnneCosta@gmail.com 
October 16, 2020 In Retreats

@Home Retreat, October 2020

Triangle@Home Monthly Morning Retreat
October 17th, 2020 9:00-10:00am

*Prepare your space:
Find an area where hopefully you will not be disturbed for your quiet time. Perhaps you want a blanket for yourself (or a teddy bear?).

*Gather your supplies:
Timer, note paper and/or journal, pen. You may want to bring in one or two inspirational books.

*Create an “altar”:
Put a few meaningful items out, include a candle.

*Opening Song – Come Holy Ghost or one of your choice.

(This is a video in case you want to listen to it & sing along).  ****(There is an Ad at the beginning of this link. I apologize.
I don’t know how to copy the link and not have the ad show up.  Please skip it as soon as you can.)

Lyrics:
Come, Holy Ghost, Creator blest, And in our hearts take up Thy rest;
Come with thy grace and heav’nly aid to fill our hearts which thou hast made,
To fill our hearts which Thou has made.

O Comforter, to thee we cry, Thou heav’nly gift of God most high;
Thou fount of life, and fire of love, And sweet anointing from above,
And sweet anointing from above.

Chorus:
Be not afraid, where you go there I am with you. (2x)

O Holy Ghost, through thee alone, Know we the Father and the Son;
Be this our firm unchanging creed, That thou dost from them both proceed,
That thou dost from them both proceed.

Praise we the Lord, Father and Son, And Holy Spirit with them one;
And may the Son on us bestow all gifts that from the Spirit flow,
All gifts that from the Spirit flow.

Chorus:
Be not afraid, where you go there I am with you. (2x)

*Opening Prayers –
The Sign of the Cross/Our Father/Hail Mary/Glory Be or your choice.

*Intention:
This is a reflective, healing time and we ask that it be filled with the love of the Holy Spirit, the care of Mother Mary and the guidance of all our guardian angels. We are here to learn from one another and to support each other on our journey towards a closer, more intimate relationship with Our Lord.

*Write out a prayer request or a few and add them to your “altar.”

*Reflection –
The world is still dealing with the Corona Virus. Nothing much has changed since March except Covid fatigue has now arrived. We are faced with daily decisions based on little information about how to take care of ourselves and our families and many are finding it to be very daunting. How are you doing? How have you continued to stay connected to God, the Divine, Our Lord? What has come into your heart and your life during this time of chaos and uncertainty, peace, hope, fear, compassion maybe even gratitude?
Using your journal write about any insights. (10-15 min.)

Gospel
LK 12:8-12
Jesus said to his disciples:
“I tell you,
everyone who acknowledges me before others
the Son of Man will acknowledge before the angels of God.
But whoever denies me before others
will be denied before the angels of God.
“Everyone who speaks a word against the Son of Man will be forgiven,
but the one who blasphemes against the Holy Spirit
will not be forgiven.
When they take you before synagogues and before rulers and authorities,
do not worry about how or what your defense will be
or about what you are to say.
For the Holy Spirit will teach you at that moment what you should say.”

*Journaling Time –
What did you hear God sharing with you? What do you want to share with God? (10-15 minutes)

*Centering Prayer –
10 to 20 (recommended) minutes of silent time (you decide.)

*Centering Prayer – Guidelines
1. Sit comfortably.
2. Choose a sacred word on which to focus.
3. Set a timer.
4. Don’t judge, just observe.
5. The phrase that often precedes Centering Prayer is: I let go of security, affection & control and fully accept this moment exactly as it is. (Optional)
6. Take a few breaths at the end to return to the present moment and to reflect on the experience.

*Make it Your Own:
Perhaps you have an inspirational book you have been meaning to investigate but you just haven’t had the opportunity. Now is the time. If you have some time left before the end of the hour open it and see what other messages the Holy is sending to you.
You could also use this time to say the Rosary. Saturday in the Catholic Church is set aside as “Mary’s Day” and the reflection is on the Joyful Mysteries.

*Closing Prayer –

Dear God,
Speak gently in my silence.
When the loud outer noises of my surroundings and the loud inner noises of my fears keep pulling me away from you,
help me to trust that you are still there even when I am unable to hear you.
Give me ears to listen to your small, soft voice saying: “Come to me, you who are overburdened,
and I will give you rest…
for I am gentle and humble of heart.”
Let that loving voice be my guide.
Amen

Excerpt from With Open Hands by Henri J.M. Nouwen, ave maria press, 2006

“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your minds, so that you may discern what is the will of God-what is good and acceptable and perfect.” Romans 12:1-2

*Sharing a Word Exercise – choose a word from your reading or your quiet time (your sacred word?) and share it on an email to me. Feel free to share any other thoughts or insights you have gained from this sacred time. I will send out an email with everyone’s response around Noon today.

Thank you.

Jean Costa, MSW, RYT
Certified Spiritual Director
JeanAnneCosta@gmail.com