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Jean A. Costa / Posts tagged "laugh"
November 10, 2013 In Faith

Not if, When

Affirmation:  I know life will present many challenges and
I have a tool box filled with lots of helpful equipment.

 
The
conversation was about the chaotic state of my home because of a
renovation.  Oh, I fully recognized the
blessing of being able to perform a renovation but the project had now been
going on for months and was running much longer than had been estimated.

I was
tired.  Way too much energy was being
expended on this, not to mention money and I wanted to put my home back in
order.  The homeowner I was speaking with
had just completed building a house, not on her own but she was responsible for
all of the decisions and it was a beautiful home, the most stunning home I
could ever remember being in.  She
explained to me that one shouldn’t be asking themselves about the
“ifs” one might experience during the building process but one should
recognize that there would be “whens” and the real question was how
was one going to deal with them?  What
did one need to do to be prepared when issues would come along?
 
I am an
optimist by choice.  When someone tells
me something is going to go well and work out, I choose to believe them.  It’s not always the truth.  Stuff still happens but I haven’t focused on
what might go wrong. I am that person who creates positive affirmations.  I am that person who expects things to go
right. 
 
The
Buddhists say one should imagine the glass broken.  The Christians refer to the “practice of
faith” and the yogi studies a Klesha called raga which refers to an attachment to pleasure.  Whatever faith you look at they all have one
very important feature in common; they recognize that life is not a bowl of
cherries.  Life has pits and we should be
aware of that teaching.
 
The
question that arises is how does one prepare oneself for the difficulties life
will present? Certainly going around waiting for the next shoe to drop or for
the clouds to appear is not a very joyful way to live one’s life but we all
know stuff will come along, little things and difficult things with which we
will have to deal.
 
I am
someone who is all about maintenance.  I
was a great Girl Scout.  I try to always
be prepared.  If there is some step I can
take to hopefully make life easier or smoother, I will usually take it.  I am that person who gets her flu shot every
year.  I take my vitamins, especially
that calcium and fish oil and now extra vitamin D.  I brush and floss my teeth twice a day.  God forbid they should rot away and fall
out.  I exercise daily to keep everything
in good working order and to hopefully avoid becoming immobile and decrepit. I
am the person who buys travel insurance. 
I’m not worried about any of these things.  I just feel like if I can take steps to
insure my life goes along smoothly, I should. 
I have many friends who do not think like me.  I have one friend who has never gotten a flu
shot and as of this writing, has never gotten the flu.  Thank heavens!  I also have a friend who never does any
maintenance on her home.  I am always
looking around my house and trying to spiff it up before something drastic
happens, like an exploding hot water heater or an ant infestation or, well you
can probably add your own stuff to that list.
 
I have a
huge red tool box.  I mean I need all
those different type of screw drivers just in case the screw is a Phillips or a
Flat-head or it’s big or very tiny.  I
know many of you completely understand but my friend, she never does anything
to her home until it becomes some sort of an issue for her.  She cannot for the life of her understand why
I am always doing my best to forestall something in the home from becoming a
major investment.  I believe that if I
take care of it now, it’ll be a little problem rather than a huge one.  We just don’t agree but that’s ok.  We love one another anyway.  Unfortunately, the results of my maintenance
approach to life really doesn’t seem to make my life that much easier than her
life is for her.  Things I never even dreamed
would occur, occur.  So, the question is,
“How can I best prepare for the whens of life?  What tools do I have in life’s tool box for
when a screw comes loose or falls out and everything it’s been holding
together, falls apart?”
 
Pray,
it’s my first defense.  I believe in
answered prayer.  I don’t understand how
it works but I fully trust that it does.

Journal,
I write. It centers me and helps me see things more clearly.  It makes me calmer.

Exercise,
it is known to increase endorphins and reduce stress.  It doesn’t matter if you go to your mat to do
yoga or take a walk or go play golf.  It
takes you out of your routine and helps calm you.

Talk to a
friend or find a counselor.  Pick up the
phone or go visit a friend.  Don’t try to
go it alone.  Most people like to be
helpful and most of us need help to get through life’s challenges, sometimes
even the little ones.

Watch
something funny, laugh.

Give or
get a hug or two and finally, remember to Breathe.  Take a few deep breaths every so often and
don’t hesitate to sigh them out.  Even if
you haven’t fixed the entire problem with that deep breath, you’ve at least
released it for that moment and life really is about living one moment at a
time. 
August 12, 2012 In Uncategorized

Dancing for Life

Affirmation:  I smile early, laugh daily, dance often.

In most cultures
dance is an integral part of life.  Here
in the United States one must make a greater effort to find the opportunity to
dance.  Lately in the media there’s more
about dance than in the last fifty years. There’s Dancing with the Stars and
there’s So You Think You Can Dance.  Even
the 2012 Olympic Gold Medal winner, Ryan Lochte is interested in dancing.  When he was interviewed on Good Morning
America he said he would like the opportunity to compete on Dancing with the
Stars.  And, too, Hope Solo, the 2012
goalie of the Gold Medal Olympic soccer team competed in 2011 on Dancing with
the Stars.  And, the Olympic Gold
Medalist Apolo Ohno speed skating champion, danced his way to the Mirror Ball
Trophy.
Now too, we have
all sorts of dance exercise.  The gym I
go to, Rex Wellness of Cary has had a Latin dance class for many years and of
course there’s aerobics which usually has some sort of upbeat tunes.  As of this writing, Zumba has become very
popular.  And, most yoga classes have
music in the background.
Yoga is not
normally thought of as a form of dance exercise but I have always felt the
vibrations and the rhythm of the music as I practiced the asanas.  When I trained at Kripalu Center for Yoga and
Healing we had several wonderful classes that included live drum music. The
Dance Yoga concept (formerly Dance Kinetics) was actually developed at Kripalu.
At the Pink Ribbon Yoga Retreat Saturday evenings are celebrated with Yoga
Dance.
TJ Martin, one of
our gifted yoga teachers and a founding member of the retreat, has led us in
Yoga Dance for the last eight years.  Of
course, there are many different reactions to our dance event.  Some, like myself, can’t wait.
In The Artist’s
Way, Julia Cameron asks you to imagine what you would like to do if you had
several other lives.  It’s a fun exercise
to see what you might be missing that you could actually do in this life.  I would have loved to be more actively involved
in the world of dance.  There have been
times in my life when the music led me to total abandonment.  I love going shopping with my granddaughter,
Isabelle, because she’ll just smile if she sees me dancing about in the store,
unlike my children, who I am sure were mortified by their mother’s lack of
decorum. 
Many of the women
who come to the retreat have been there before but everyone has had that
initial introduction to our evening of Yoga Dance.   TJ does a marvelous job of explaining how
the session is structured.  She explains
that each of the songs are designed to open one of the seven chakras, energy
centers of the body.  A yoga practice
with or without dance can aid in opening the energy centers. The seven chakras
begin at the base of the spine, the Root Chakra and run through the body to the
top of the head, the Crown Chakra. 
Envision a stream of energy or light, moving up through your body,
flowing freely, keeping everything open and clean and soft.  Ancient yoga tradition teaches when the chakras
are opened and aligned, we are balanced and in a state that encourages optimal
health.
TJ brings some
props too.  She brings feather boas and
mesh scarves.  Some of the women bring
coin skirts.  At our last retreat two of
the returning ladies came to the evening session a little late.  They attempted to come in quietly so as to
not disturb the group, the only issue was they had on their coin skirts and had
added bell bracelets and anklets.  They
also were in full flowing skirts and had silk flowers in their hair.  The fun had begun!
TJ begins our evening by inviting us to sit on
our mats.  We move slowly at first.  One of the songs for the 1st chakra is
Breathe.  Then she invites us to stand up
and we move to songs like Feeling Good by Michael Buble. Then the energy begins
to increase and for the 3rd chakra we get to dance to Shake Your Body and New
Attitude for example.  The next set of
songs include songs like We Are Family, Walk of Life, You Raise Me Up and Loka
Samasta. Can you hear it?  Can you feel
it?  Finally, we’re ready to wind down
and we do that to songs like The Empty Sky.
Yoga dance is one
of the healing modalities we offer for the retreat.  One year one of the participants did not seem
to connect with anyone or anything that was being offered.  We would find her sitting in the living room
watching TV while everyone else was chatting. 
She wasn’t very interested in the art projects and her favorite yoga
pose was savasana.  And, then during Yoga
Dance we reached the songs for the 3rd chakra.    I happened to be directly across from her
when the music began and it was one of the most astonishing things I have ever
seen.  A grin came to her face, she lit
up from within and she began to dance with total abandonment.  She didn’t stop until we were ready to lie
down.  Her enthusiasm and love of music
took her to a place during the retreat that nothing else was able to
accomplish.  From then on, she was an
integral part of the group.  People took
the time to tell her how much they enjoyed watching her and dancing with
her.
There have also
been women who refused to dance.  I try
not to judge but I wasn’t always successful. 
But if they return, sooner or later (sometimes years later) something
happens and I will look up and there they will be moving and smiling, and many
times laughing.  It is so very
joyful.  It is so very healing.
I believe we can
enhance our health by sometimes tricking our bodies to think we are feeling
good.  I once read a story about a man
who played the music for silent films. 
He was asked if it was hard to play music that went with the feelings of
the scenes.  He answered he didn’t
concern himself with that.  The music he
chose created the emotions the viewers experienced.
If you’re sad and
you don’t want to be, smile.  If you’re
feeling blue and you don’t want to be, laugh. 
And, if you want to fully embrace life and go a little crazy, turn on
the music and dance.
“Dance as though no one is watching you,

Love as though you have never been hurt
before,

Sing as though no one can hear you,

Live as though heaven is on earth.”  Dr. William W. Purkey