New Year
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Jean A. Costa / Posts tagged "New Year"
January 22, 2016 In Affirmations, Women

Claim Your Power, Choose Your Perceptions

Affirmation: I have the power to choose my perceptions of all the events of my life.

 

images-2We are presently into the third week of 2016. It’s the beginning of a whole new year. Many people have shared with me their goals or resolutions. One person when describing her expectation of the new year used the word “awesome!” Another told me she always gets excited at the beginning of a new year with all the possibilities that will be presented to her. Certainly we get to choose how we want to imagine our unknown future. I have one person in my life who says she doesn’t imagine the future at all. She simply allows it to unfold, there’s no expectation of any sort. Do you think that’s actually possible? She must be making plans for some things and she, I would imagine is planning for a good or at least a pleasant outcome. When we start out on an adventure, and yes a new year (even a new day) is the beginning of an adventure, we will normally carry in our minds and hearts some sense of anticipation. When the angels appeared to the shepherd to announce the beginning of Jesus’ life here on earth they heralded, “Be not afraid.” They were offering them a choice and guiding them to be at peace. Our response to what happens to us is in most respects what we get to choose. We may be anxious about the unknown but we can choose whether we want to be excited or filled with fear.

womens-retreat-1At this year’s Immaculate Conception women’s retreat I found myself pondering the question of how to hold the future events of my life in a positive, blessed light? I began by trying to believe that everything that will happen to me will be for my good and while that may be true, the real truth is there are some things that I would rather avoid, even if they are for my good. I guess it’s like not wanting to require medicine in order to get over some illness or even not having to eat Kale in order to stay healthy. When unpleasant things arise and someone shares with me that’s it’s probably for my benefit, I think of my husband Sandy’s expression when he says, “that’s like practicing bleeding.” It’s not anything with which anyone wants to deal. So, I began to go around asking people how they make peace with all the aspects of their lives, those we label “bad” or “disagreeable” or worst of all “disastrous.”

 

The Seekers, one of my study groups, usually does a year end review together and we present a few questions to help shape the vision of the future year. This year we have chosen several questions from Sarah Susanka, renown architect and author of The Not So Big House and The Not So Big Life. She actually sent out the questions to promote a workshop she was presenting in Chapel Hill. I share them here for your perusal:

 

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What has inspired you over the past year?

  • What were your sorrows and disappointments from the year, and how have you been changed by them?
  • What were your enthusiasms, accomplishments, creations and joys, and how have you been changed by them?
  • What new patterns of behavior have you adopted over the past year, and what effects have they had?
  • How are you different this year than you were last year at this time?
  • Are there any things you are being asked to do right now that you are rejecting?
  • What recent synchronicities do you recall?
  • To what part of yourself are you giving birth?
  • Specifically what is it that you wish to focus on or experience in the coming year?

Father Jude Siciliano was our retreat facilitator this year. He leads gently, not with commands but with a soft voice and reflective questions and readings. This year he opened the first session with Rumi’s The Guest House.

 

 

jude-1

images-3This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice.
meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.
Be grateful for whatever comes.
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

What does it take to “welcome them all in?” Once I learn to do that will I have peace, will I no longer carry fear and anxiety with me into the unknown? If my faith is true and strong will I be protected and gently cared for and be spared the travails and disasters of life? If they do come is it because I wasn’t “good enough” or faithful enough? This was my question to all I met as I began this new year? I am pleased to share that I have found the answer or perhaps a better phrase would be that I have been blessed with an answer.

Unknown-1The answer, for me, is that life will happen no matter how strong or great my faith. Life will present challenges and disappointments no matter how many positive affirmations I create to try to avoid suffering. Pain is a part of our human existence and no one gets to go through life without it. Sometimes it’s in small things, like a festering splinter or a bad cold and sometimes it’s heart wrenching and debilitating. We all know what those events can look like. There’s a popular phrase used in the media right now, to paraphrase it it says, “stuff happens.” We may be able to welcome it all in, like Rumi suggests but it’s the challenge of a lifetime. What I have discovered is that after, yes after, not normally during, I will get to choose how I want to perceive the “stuff.” Will I see it for the blessing it can be, it may have brought, the lessons I may have received or will it remain nothing but continued pain and suffering? I began to make peace with who I am and how I have previously responded to the challenges of my life and I realized that with my faith, from all these years of practicing my faith, I have the free will to choose how I shape that experience, no matter how I labeled it at the moment of its conception. I am a strong, resourceful, loving person and I fully recognize that things will happen to me that will knock me down but I also believe that I have created the inner and outer resources to rise up again and to believe that I can,

“meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.
Be grateful for whatever comes.
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.”

So in answer to Sarah Susanka’s last question, for the following year I want to focus on the fact that I can choose to believe 2016 will be exciting because I know I get to choose my response to whatever happens to me and I choose “Awesome.” In fact, I’ve decided to choose “Awesome” for the rest of my life.

December 29, 2013 In Uncategorized

Year End Review

Affirmation:
I examine the past with an eye on my best
The
conversation revolved around how different generations use technology.  Adam, my daughter’s fiancé spoke with me about how those over 50 had to learn about social
media; how for those in their late 20’s and 30’s it was simply an extension of
the computer skills they learned as children and how those in their teens today have grown up with
social media.  It’s an integral part of
their life, like radio or TV is to some. 
He then went on to tell me that my 16 year old granddaughter will have a
complete photo history of her life not because we have been photographing her
since birth, which we have, but because she posts photos and everyday events on
the social media sites and has been for several years.  She has been carefully schooled by her
parents about the dangers of sharing too much information or about sharing inappropriate
information. So far, so good. After our discussion I found myself thinking how
nice it would be for me to have a complete record of my life.  The older I become, the more there is to
remember and the more I seemed to have forgotten.
For me,
recalling the past can sometimes be quite a challenge.  Unless, the event is tied to a significant emotional response. 
I have at least one friend who can remember the names of all her
teachers from elementary school through high school.  My sister can recognize people she hasn’t
seen in years and my husband’s ability to remember where we’ve traveled and
what we’ve done is amazing.  I on the
other hand really struggle with those skills. 
I do, however, remember holding my oldest daughter’s hand as we walked
together to her pre-school. I remember when my youngest crawled into bed with
me early in the morning to hug for a while before she went off to school and I
can recall every one of my son’s projects and there have been many, because of
the excitement he generated as he took them on. 

The TV
show Sixty Minutes had two separate programs about memory issues.  The first was about people who cannot
remember faces, not even the faces of their loved ones.  They are not ignorant by any means but that part of their brain simply doesn’t
hold that information.  The same program
also looked at people who had no directional skills.  They were lucky to get out of their own
homes.  That part of their brain didn’t
provide that skill.   On the second
program they interviewed people who could recall every moment of their lives as
if they had a file cabinet in their brains and they could access whatever
information they needed whenever they needed it.  At the time of the show, there were only
about a dozen people known world wide with this skill.  I am pleased to say,  I do not have any of these issues or
skills.  My memory is selective and
challenging but I can easily recognize my loved ones and many others and I have
a fairly strong sense of direction but whereas I would like to more clearly
remember my past, I would not want to carry every one of those memories with me
throughout my life.  I think that would
be overwhelming and exhausting. 

It is,
however, very important for me to review the past. It’s probably why I keep a
journal and a little pocket calendar where I write the day’s past events. For
me it’s like looking in the rear view mirror of the car before changing lanes
because them I am aware of what’s going on around me.  I have found it to be very helpful to put
together a yearly family photo calendar. 
Going back over the year’s significant events really helps me to recall
that which was important to me and what brought me joy.  Otherwise, the year all blends together.  Then the years all blend together and those
highlights I so enjoyed and those lessons I learned get lost.  It’s the difference between living a life of
many different colors and tastes and living one that’s gray and bland.

I have
a monthly and a yearly practice of asking myself 10 questions that I feel will
improve the quality of my life going forward. I gathered these several years
ago from a newspaper article by Sharon Randal from Henderson, Nevada.
1. What
was the hardest thing I had to do this year?
2. What
was the most fun?
3. What
were the milestones?
4. What
was my biggest accomplishment?
5.
What’s something I wanted to do but didn’t?
6. What
was my biggest surprise?
7. What
was the best thing I did for another?
8. What
was something I worried about that I don’t worry about now?
9. What
made me proud?
10.
Describe a moment I want to remember.
I feel
the only reason to review the past, is to find a way to live better in the
future. Look it over, learn the lesson and then let it go. The last part may be
the hardest lesson of all.
January 6, 2013 In Uncategorized

Don’t Make a Resolution, Create an Affirmation

How many new years have you tried to enact some form
of change for yourself?  New Year’s
resolutions present themselves every January, and once in a while a resolution
works but all too often they fail leaving us exactly where we started and
feeling powerless or just plain sad.  One
of the problems with a resolution is that most of them are phrased using the
future tense.  “This year I will begin
exercising.”  “As of January 2nd, I will
begin my diet.”  “I will stop
smoking.”  It’s like making a wish and
then sitting back and waiting to see if it comes true or not.
A more effective way to initiate change in your life
is to set an intention and then to create an affirmation.
When teaching yoga I encourage the participants to
“set an intention” for their practice session.  That’s all I say.  I could give them examples but it’s so much
more effective and powerful when a yogi forms his or her own intention.  I have carried this beginning practice step
into my life.  I make an effort to set an
intention for each day and especially for the beginning of the New Year.  Once my intention becomes known to me, I then
form an affirmation to cement it into my mind, body and spirit.
 
What exactly is an affirmation?  An affirmation
is a statement that makes firm that which you believe.  It is a statement
about that which you perceive to be true. 
You can have positive or negative affirmations.  When I began
writing out my affirmations, I discovered the power of controlling my
thoughts.  Once you take charge of what
you’re thinking, you then take charge of your life.  For me there was also joy and power in the
process of creating the affirmations.  I
love testing the words, seeing what resonated and deciding what was so important
to me that I would focus on it day after day.
Not sure it will work for you?  Think about this.  All those negative statements you’ve been
telling yourself for as long as you can remember, how have they been working?  They’ve probably worked quite well but
unfortunately not to your benefit. 
Changing them to positive statements will work too and think how much
better you’ll feel.
What does your self-talk look like?  Sometimes,
you’re having the conversation when you’re alone.  Sometimes, you’re saying
the same things to yourself but you’re not alone.  And, sometimes you’re saying things aloud
about yourself that you would never say to or about a dear friend.  What are the phrases you’ve adopted over the
years?  “Boy, am I stupid.” or “I never get it right!”
How about, “I can’t do that.” or “It frightens me.”  An affirmation is about changing the things
you tell yourself in order to empower yourself and improve the quality of your
life.  It’s a powerful free tool that can
make a positive difference in your life.  Begin by noticing when your
self-talk weakens you, makes you feel powerless, or useless.  Pay
attention!  That’s the first step, awareness.
When creating an affirmation avoid the word
“not.”  It won’t work to your benefit; it may even work to your
detriment. I heard a story many years ago about a mother teaching her
daughter to drive.  There was a huge
bolder in the road ahead.  The mother
kept reminding her daughter about it. 
“Don’t go near the bolder.” 
“Don’t’ hit the bolder.”   What do
you think happened?  They were both so
focused on missing the rock in the road, they drove right into it.  It’s the same with negatives in your
affirmation.  You won’t hear the “not”
and you’ll move right into the place you’re trying to avoid.
There are phrases you can use instead of enlisting the
negative.  For example:  “I release” or “I let go
of.”  Two of my affirmations using those phrases are:  “I
let go of fear and anxiety.” and “I release myself from my childhood
limitations.”  It’s simply more
effective than saying: “I will not let fear and anxiety influence my
life.”  I have chosen to tell myself, “I eat mindfully”
instead of saying, “I do not eat foods that are bad for me.”  Another example is, “I attract financial
prosperity.” rather than, “I don’t waste my money.”  Can you hear the difference?  Can you
feel the difference? 
I sometimes write out the affirmation without too much
thought and then take time to fine tune it. Begin by taking a few minutes
and re-reading the words.  You are
looking for words that stir an emotion in you. 
Don’t over analyze it.  Let the
sentence be a statement of how you want to perceive your life.  Write it in the present tense.  It may be a statement you have a difficult
time believing but try it anyway. 
Sometimes those are the most powerful. I have a dear friend whose
affirmation is, “I am a gifted and talented artist.”  When she first claimed that, she did not feel
that way but that’s how she wanted to feel. 
It worked!  She now is a gifted
and talented artist.  Her affirmation led
her to the steps which led her to believe in herself and to expand her gifts
and talents. 
One example of an affirmation I use in my daily
practice is:  When I stay focused on the
present, I am calmer and more peaceful. 
I created this one because I believe what is truly important is
today.  Worry magnifies my difficulties and diminishes my ability to live
fully in the present moment.  Anxieties
almost always arise because I fail to put all my effort into the here and
now.  I am calmer and more peaceful when I focus more on the gifts of each
day, instead of worrying about tomorrow or reliving something unpleasant from
the past. 
The quality of my life is all about how I perceive
every event and person, including myself. 
If I can change myself for the better, won’t that help others? If you
did the same thing, wouldn’t that help you, the world, or at least your world?
It’s an amazing process. Take full advantage of it.  Write them down, write them every day, post
them on your bathroom mirror, by your doorway, on your computer and wait! 
Instead of another set of New Year’s resolutions you didn’t keep, you’ll have
created a set of affirmations that will change your life in ways you never
before dreamed possible.
December 30, 2012 In Uncategorized

A Year End Review: Looking Back Before You Go Forward

Affirmation: I examine the past with an eye on my best future. 

 The conversation revolved around how different generations use technology.  Adam, my daughter’s fiancé spoke me about how those over 50 had to learn about social media; how for those in their late 20’s and 30’s it was simply an extension of the computer skills they learned as children and how those in their teens today have grown up with social media.  It’s an integral part of their life, like radio or TV is to some.  He then went on to tell me that my 15 year old granddaughter will have a complete photo history of her life not because we have been photographing her since birth, which we have, but because she posts photos and everyday events on the social media sites and has been for several years.  She has been carefully schooled by her parents about the dangers of sharing too much information or about sharing inappropriate information. So far, so good. After our discussion I found myself thinking how nice it would be nice for me to have a complete record of my life.  The older I become, the more there is to remember and the more I seemed to have forgotten.



Joey’s Sky Diving Team

For me, recalling the past can sometimes be quite a challenge.  Unless, the event is tied to a significant emotional response.  I have at least one friend who can remember the names of all her teachers from elementary school through high school.  My sister can recognize people she hasn’t seen in years and my husband’s ability to remember where we’ve traveled and what we’ve done is amazing.  I on the other hand really struggle with those skills.  I do, however, remember holding my oldest daughter’s hand as we walked together to her pre-school. I remember when my youngest crawled into bed with me early in the morning to hug for a while before she went off to school and I can recall every one of my son’s projects and there have been many, because of the excitement he generated as he took them on.  

The TV show Sixty Minutes had two separate programs about memory issues.  The first was about people who cannot remember faces, not even the faces of their loved ones.  They are not ignorant by any means but that part of their brain simply doesn’t hold that information.  The same program also looked at people who had no directional skills.  They were lucky to get out of their own homes.  That part of their brain didn’t provide that skill.   On the second program they interviewed people who could recall every moment of their lives as if they had a file cabinet in their brains and they could access whatever information they needed whenever they needed it.  At the time of the show, there were only about a dozen people know world wide with this skill.  I am pleased to say,  I do not have any of these issues or skills.  My memory is selective and challenging but I can easily recognize my loved ones and many others and I have a fairly strong sense of direction but whereas I would like to more clearly remember my past, I would not want to carry every one of those memories with me throughout my life.  I think that would be overwhelming and exhausting.  
It is, however, very important for me to review the past. It’s probably why I keep a journal and a little pocket calendar where I write the day’s past events. For me it’s like looking in the rear view mirror of the car before changing lanes because them I am aware of what’s going on around me.  I have found it to be very helpful to put together a yearly family photo calendar.  Going back over the year’s significant events really helps me to recall that which was important to me and what brought me joy.  Otherwise, the year all blends together.  Then the years all blend together and those highlights I so enjoyed and those lessons I learned get lost.  It’s the difference between living a life of many different colors and tastes and living one that’s gray and bland.
I have a monthly and a yearly practice of asking myself 10 questions that I feel will improve the quality of my life going forward. I gathered these several years ago from a newspaper article by Sharon Randal from Henderson, Nevada.
1. What was the hardest thing I had to do this year?
2. What was the most fun?
3. What were the milestones?
4. What was my biggest accomplishment?
5. What’s something I wanted to do but didn’t?
6. What was my biggest surprise?
7. What was the best thing I did for another?
8. What was something I worried about that I don’t worry about now?
9. What made me proud?
10. Describe a moment I want to remember.  

For me the moment I most want to remember is when most of my family took a trip to Disney World.  On our last evening there the other adults chose to go back to the condo.  I however, chose to hang out with my four grandchildren.  We spent the night watching the light shows, the fireworks and the people.  It warms my heart and feeds my soul to remember that evening.  

I feel the only reason to review the past, is to find a way to live better in the future. Look it over, learn the lesson and then let it go. The last part may be the hardest lesson of all.

January 7, 2012 In Uncategorized

Manifesting the New Year

Affirmation:  I am always manifesting; I manifest to my highest and best.
The beginning of a new year can be filled with mixed feelings and expectations.  Many years ago the cartoon For Better or For Worse had a New Year’s Day cartoon of Elizabeth, the young daughter, opening her new calendar and exclaiming “I can’t wait to put down all the wonderful things that will happen.”  If I were to closely examine my reaction to a new year it would not necessarily be filled with the expectation of delightful events.  I find I must be very aware of the feeling of dread that can present itself as I look forward to the future especially if I am dealing with post Christmas let-down.  It takes a conscientious effort to turn my thinking around and to prepare myself for the delights that I am sure are waiting for me.  Once again, I am faced with the choice of Faith or Fear.
I truly believe we manifest our own realities.  I am always manifesting and I want to manifest to my highest and best.  I don’t like to leave the quality of my life to chance.  There are always things I can be working on that will enrich my life.  One of my practices of many years is to take time at the beginning of the new year and to decide what’s important to me and what I’d like to see manifest itself.  I do this by looking at the different aspects of my life and seeing what I want to emphasize and concentrate on.

I divide my life into several categories.  Certainly, you can choose any that might work for you but mine are:  Spiritual, Physical, Mental, Family & Friends, Material, Community and Financial.  I set intentions and create affirmations for each section.   

Spiritual:  For example, one of my intentions is to meditate daily. I write:  I meditate once a day for at least 20 minutes.  Another Spiritual desire is to increase my faith so I write:  I pray daily and I attend church weekly.  I participate in my Small Christian Community and look for other  opportunities to participate in events that will increase my faith.
Physical:   My intention here is to be of optimal health.  What steps do I need to take that will lead to that state?  I write:  I fine tune my diet by eating clean at least 80% of the time.  I look for fun ways to exercise.  I do some form of exercise daily. 
Mental:  I know I am either green and growing or ripe and rotten.  I read a wonderful news article about a 93 year old man who recently learned to read and write.  He then went on to publish a book.  That’s my intention; to be learning as long as I’m alive.  So I write:  I look for opportunities that help me grow.  I am studying the fiddle, Spanish and doing a crossword a day.  I am open to all learning opportunities: travel, classes, lectures, documentaries, and new people and experience. 
Family & Friends:  When it comes to my Family and Friends category, I usually focus on what I’d like the most if they were considering me and try to create that intention for themselves.  I would like more of their time and attention.  So I write:  I carve out a regular time to spend with each of my loved ones and look for opportunities when we can share experiences. 
Material:  I include the Material category because I feel we live in a material world and it needs to be addressed.  In the past I’ve focused on living in a different house or perhaps making the house I live in, different, lighter, brighter, more comfortable.  This year I write:  I only keep the things I love and use and let go of the rest. 
Community:  Community is essential to everyone’s well being.  I write:  I volunteer my time, treasure and talent to help those who are within my power to be of help to.  I focus my talents on projects that I know make a positive difference in the lives of others.  I enjoy sharing my home with my friends and family and look for opportunities to do so.
Financial:  I attract financial prosperity.  I look for opportunities that increase our income and that decrease our expenses. 
 I don’t review them regularly.  I have found that there is great power in simply writing out my intentions and then letting them marinate.  I usually review last year’s at the beginning of the New Year.  I am always fascinated by how many of the intentions have come to fruition; fascinated and grateful that I took the time to work on manifesting the year ahead.  What do you want your New Year to manifest?  Claim some time, give it some thought and put it on paper.  Fill in your calendar now before the year starts.  Fill it in with all the things you want it to hold:  joy, love, hope, peace, great health, adventure.  It’s yours; it’s waiting for you to claim it and to manifest it. 
December 31, 2011 In Uncategorized

Don’t Make a Resolution, Create an Affirmation

How many New Year’s have you tried to enact some form of change for yourself?  New Year’s resolutions present themselves every January, and once in a while, although very seldom, a resolution will work.  One of the problems with a resolution is the wording.  Most of them are phrased using the future tense.  “This year I will begin exercising.”  “As of January 2nd, I will begin my diet.”  “I will stop smoking.”  It’s like making a wish and then waiting to see if it comes true or not.

A more effective way to initiate change in your life is to create an affirmation.

What exactly is an affirmation?  What does it look like?  How should it sound?  What phrases work, which ones don’t?  An affirmation is a statement that affirms, make firm, that which you believe.  It is a statement about that which you perceive to be true.  You can have positive or negative affirmations.  Most of us have lived our lives telling ourselves about our faults.  We also rarely hesitate to tell others about our faults.  When was the last time you graciously accepted a compliment?  When was the last time you complimented yourself?  When I began writing out my affirmations, I discovered the power of controlling my thoughts and taking charge of my life.  For me the joy was also about creating the affirmations; testing the words that resonated and deciding what was so important to me that I would focus on it day after day. 

Not sure it will work for you?  Think about this.  All those negative statements you’ve been telling yourself for as long as you can remember how have they been working?  They’ve probably worked quite well but not to your benefit.  Changing them to positive statements will work too and think how much better you’ll feel. What does your self-talk sound like?  Sometimes, you’re having the conversation when you’re alone.  Sometimes, you’re having the conversation when you’re with others and you’re not feeling comfortable, maybe you’re feeling very uncomfortable.  What are the phrases you’ve adopted over the years?  “Boy, am I stupid.” or “I never get it right!” How about, “I can’t do that. It frightens me.”  This is about changing the things you tell yourself.  You can do it.  Why would you want to start saying positive things to yourself?  Because, it’s a powerful, free tool that makes a positive difference in the quality of your life.  Begin by noticing when your self-talk weakens you, makes you feel powerless, or useless.  Pay attention! 

Join me as we go on this journey.  We’ll take it one step at a time. 
When creating an affirmation avoid the word “not.”  Why?  It won’t work to your benefit; it may even work to your detriment. I heard a story many years ago about a mother teaching her daughter to drive.  There was a huge bolder in the road ahead.  The mother kept reminding her daughter about it.  “Watch out for the bolder.”  “Don’t’ hit the bolder.” “Make sure you miss the bolder.”  What do you think happened?  They were both so focused on missing the rock in the road, they drove right into it.   It’s the same with negatives in your affirmation.  You won’t hear the “not” and you’ll move right into the place you’re trying to avoid. What are some things in your life you’d like to let go of, or release?  Make a list, choose one or two that seem the most relevant. 
There are some phrases you can use instead of enlisting the negative.  For example:  “I release” or “I let go of.”  Two of my affirmations using those phrases are:  “I let go of fear and anxiety.” and “I release myself from my childhood limitations.”  I’m sure you can come up with some others.  Give it a try.  It’s simply more effective than saying: “I will not let fear and anxiety influence my life.”  Can you hear the difference?  Can you feel the difference? 

 When creating an affirmation, it is helpful to use words that resonate deeply with you.  Try out some of the words; see if they cause a visceral reaction.  The following list is one I have used for several yoga retreats I’ve facilitated and many of which you will find in my daily affirmations.  Some are adjectives and some are nouns.  It doesn’t matter, use them anyway that works for you.

Accomplished, Faithful, Hopeful, Humble, Empowering, Grateful, Connected, Integrated, Joyful, Direct, Discerning, Loving, Capable, Sense of Humor, Enlightened, Compassionate, Influential, Dedicated, Delightful, Dependable, Devoted, Learner, Energized, Imaginative, Attentive, Daring, Facilitator, Family Oriented, Accepting, Free, Fun, Inventive, Laughs Easily, Aware, Sensitive, Tender, Honest, Articulate, Artistic, Courageous, Inquisitive, Instructor, Passionate, Sexy, Sensual, Present, Grace-Filled, Careful, Beautiful, Healthy, Patient, Unique, Preserving, Vulnerable, Radiant, Refined, Adventurer, Satisfied, Educated, Calm, Content, Peaceful, Open-Minded, Transformative, Serene, Truthful, Spontaneous, Thoughtful, Creative, Experienced, Leader, Teacher, Guide, Encouraging, Seeker, Trustworthy, Happy, Abundant, Planner, Visionary, Gentle, Soft, Triumphant, Understanding, Uplifting, Supportive, Prosperous, Contributor, Discoverer, Nurturing, Graceful, Glowing, Hearty, Hardy, Hottie, Playful, Fulfilled, Forgiving, Non-Judgemental, Non-Grasping, Dreamer, Questioning, Optimistic.
I sometimes write out the affirmation without too much thought and then take time to fine tune it. Begin by taking a few minutes and re-reading the words.  You are looking for words that stir an emotion in you.  Don’t over analyze it.  Circle the ones that jump out at you.  Pick three or four from the circled ones and write them down.  Let the sentence be a statement of how you want to perceive your life.  Write it in the present tense.  See how it sounds; see if it truly resonates with you. 
One example of an affirmation I use in my daily practice is:  When I stay focused on the present, I am calmer and more peaceful.  I created this one because I believe what is truly important is today.  Worry magnifies my difficulties and diminishes my ability to live fully in the present moment. Anxieties almost always arise because I fail to put all my effort into the here and now.  I am calmer and more peaceful when I focus more on the gifts of each day, instead of worrying about tomorrow or reliving something unpleasant from the past.

The quality of my life is all about how I perceive every event and person, including myself.  If I can change myself for the better, won’t that help others? If you did the same thing, how would that help you, the world, or at least your world? It’s an amazing process.  Do it!  Take full advantage of it.  Write them down, write them every day, post them on your bathroom mirror, by your doorway, on your computer and wait! Instead of another set of New Year’s resolutions you didn’t keep, you’ll have created a set of affirmations that will change your life in ways you never before dreamed possible.